Veronica Corningstone: For the entire Channel 4 news team, I'm Veronica Corningstone.

Ron Burgundy: And I'm Ron Burgundy. Go fuck yourself, San Diego.

Bea: What do you miss most about the store? And don't say having everything in its proper place. I get it. You have control issues.

Thomas McGregor: I miss being helpful. A parent or grandparent comes into this shop looking for a gift for the child they love. I ask a few simple questions and know exactly what they need. I love helping people get what they want.

[pause]

Thomas McGregor: Especially when they don't even know that they want it. Those are the best.

Pigling Bland: Diet starts now...

[he grabs and eats a fruit]

Pigling Bland: Now...

[he grabs and eats another one]

Pigling Bland: Now!

Once upon a pair of sneakers, there lived a boy who was full of creativity.

Sonic: Face it, you're never going to get my power!

[Sonic does his spin dash attack]

Knuckles: [holds down Sonic] Do I look like I need your power?

[punches out Sonic]

Bruce Springsteen: I'm in the middle of a 45 year conversation with these men and women I'm surrounded by and with some of you.

[after Dewey accidentally barges in a room filled with smoke and groupies]

Sam: [coughs] Get outta here, Dewey!

Dewey Cox: What are y'all doin' in here?

Sam: We're smoking reefer and you don't want no part of this shit.

Dewey Cox: You're smoking *reefers*?

Sam: Yeah, 'course we are; can't you smell it?

Dewey Cox: [Dewey doesn't have a sense of smell] No, Sam. I can't.

Reefer Girl: Come on, Dewey! Join the party!

[takes a hit off a joint]

Sam: No, Dewey, you don't want this. Get outta here!

Dewey Cox: You know what, I don't want no hangover. I can't get no hangover.

Sam: It doesn't give you a hangover!

Dewey Cox: Wha-I get addicted to it or something?

Sam: It's not habit-forming!

Dewey Cox: Oh, okay... well, I don't know... I don't want to overdose on it.

Sam: You can't OD on it!

Dewey Cox: It's not gonna make me wanna have sex, is it?

Sam: It makes sex even better!

Dewey Cox: Sounds kind of expensive.

Sam: It's the cheapest drug there is.

Dewey Cox: [at a loss and out of excuses] Hmm.

Sam: You don't want it!

Dewey Cox: I think I kinda want it.

Sam: Okay, but just this once. Come on in.

Keith Richards: An image like a ball and chain. It's not like a shadow, cause it's there 24 / 24. When the sun goes down it don't disappear.

Tom Waits: A lot of this has to do with persona. You have to have some type of armor so that you can continue to also develop as a human being, you know? It's like uhh, you have a recipe and you y'know, umm, you have a beverage, and you have a sandwich named after you. Pretty much, that's like what it comes down to, right? But you're still able within... inside that you're able to still grow and change. It's kind of a ventriloquist act a lot of the time, you know? But it's much safer than putting your own ass out there; like Judy Garland, you know, and melting every night.

Keith Richards: You can't buy a persona. You can either make it up... or you can be it. My idea of actual heaven, is to be a Rock & Roll star that nobody ever sees. Totally anonymous.

Keith Richards: Life's a funny thing you know. And nobody wants to get old, but they don't wanna die young either. Y'know, and you just gotta follow this thing down the path.

Paco: Well I can't think of anything right now more patriotic than violating the Patriot Act!

Harry Rydell: It is a sad fact of life, Don, but the truth is we all have to eat a little shit from time to time.

Marc Bolan: Our bed of love is like a glove, tender and warm, that we creep into when the eye of north whines like birds of prey. Our goblet sails smoothly on ethereal dreams like a mountain, solid. It begotten of the earth and at the old mother's mercy. Brown is the bread of the wilderness, but tender and with limbs light and subtle. To the eternal washing in the spring of wisdom. Winged, but not burned. Frail and frank, pillowing our sleepy bodies. Silent in the noise of the night. We snuggle and vibrate, entwined like saplings of the vine.

Ron Oberman: Okay, the thing to remember about LA is that they love an exotic Englishman out here, all right? They're going to be endless kissing your ass and promising you the world.

David Bowie: Yeah, sounds awful.

Ron Oberman: Just remember, it's not reality, all right? This is an insane, fucked up city of lies. It's like rock candy mountain or the fun fair in Pinocchio.

Charles Cummings: Sometimes it seems like nothing ever works out. What's worse is sometimes things almost work out then fall apart. If this is the way life is how do people stand it?

Charles Cummings: Someone said "If you stand in one spot long enough, the whole world will pass by." I don't know who said that, but he's an idiot.

Charles Cummings: I hate photographing people, people are the worst.

Charles Cummings: It was an important lesson I learned; You maybe disappointed by a persons humanity but never by their greed.

Joan Cummings: You're a Catholic hospital. So you better not be bullshitting me!

Ken: Have a girl, Chuck?

Charles Cummings: No thanks, I'm full.

James Brown: What's wrong, Maceo?

Maceo Parker: We can't play that like you told us. It doesn't work musically.

James Brown: Does it sound good?

Maceo Parker: Yeah

James Brown: Does it feel good?

Maceo Parker: Yeah

James Brown: If it sound good and it feel good, then it's musical.

Jordan Cahill: You can't blame the location, you can only blame yourself. The suburbs are just a state of mind.

[the Fockers' outgoing message]

Bernie Focker: Hello, you've reached the Fockers. We're not around, so leave us a message. Goodbye. Roz, how the hell do you shut this thing off?

Roz Focker: I have no idea. Just press a button.

Bernie Focker: All right, I'm pretty sure it's off. Honey, you want a chimichanga?

Roz Focker: I thought they give you gas.

Bernie Focker: A little bit, but it's worth it.

Roz Focker: Yeah, worth it for you, but I'm the one that gets the fumes.

Bernie Focker: Honey, I'm in the mood for a chimichanga!

Roz Focker: So make a chimichang...

[beep]

Ramonda: I am Queen of the most powerful nation in the world! And my entire family is gone! Have I not given everything?

Ophelia: I'm not sure I've ever met a man quite like you, Basil.

Johnny English: Let me clear up the uncertainty for you. You haven't.

[Cadbury has just made a break from jail, and is reunited with Richie]

Richie Rich: Cadbury?

Herbert Cadbury: Richie! Oh, thank God, I've been worried sick...!

[they hug each other]

Herbert Cadbury: I do beg your pardon, sir. All that emotion. Quite out of order. Got caught up in the moment.

Richie Rich: Cadbury?

Herbert Cadbury: Yes, sir?

Richie Rich: Shut up!

Herbert Cadbury: Thank you, sir.

Woody: [inhabited by Nell, seeing how Woody has dressed her body for school] You look like a common prostitute.

Nell Bedworth: [Woody in Nell's body] Damn... I was going for high class hooker.